Last night, JD and I went out with some friends. This being the first week of our new diet, we were a little hesitant about it. We turned down a dinner invitation earlier in the week because we were unsure if we would be able to align the incredibly restrictive first week of the diet with what would be served. (More about the actual diet later.) When turning down the invitation JD explained that we were trying a new diet. And again last night, after we met friends at On Tap, JD shared with everyone that we were on a diet. I cringed inwardly both times.
Thinking about it this morning, I wonder why I was unwilling to share this exciting and potentially life changing decision to go on this diet, when my husband was perfectly happy to spread the news around. And now that I’ve been poking at the feeling for a while, I think I know why I was afraid to explicitly share this part of my life with my friends and family, while being perfectly willing to share it with strangers.
[Deep Breath]. I’m afraid that the people closest to me will under-appreciate the effort. I’m afraid they will make light of it, if not outright undermine the effort. Also, I think I’m afraid that by admitting I’m on a diet, I reveal to them a way that I have failed. (As if they hadn’t noticed. As if they didn’t have eyes.) And ultimately, I’m afraid that when they realize that I’m a failure, they won’t want to be associated me anymore. You know. Because I’m not perfect.
Do I have some baggage? Boy howdy!
The good news? After sharing with family (the week night dinner we turned down) and friends (last night), everyone is still talking to us. Shocker, I know. And we successfully laid down a plan and navigated the great temptation of bar food and beer by eating before we went and having a set number of beers we were allowed to enjoy. Also, Sam Adams was on special last night, so obviously the universe was feeling friendly. 🙂