Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! In case you haven’t figured this out, I’m a bit of a geek. And this makes my geek-ish senses tingle. (Hey now! Not like that! We’re in public after all!)
Shouted from the shower “If the monkey shows, just find another shirt!”
Today was an unexpectedly hard day. A man I barely knew, who was hardly tied to my family, died recently. He led a good life. He was 89 years old. He passed after a long battle with Alzheimer’s and various “old age” illnesses, like double pneumonia. He was a veteran and well loved. We met twice, maybe three times. He was a nice man. His daughter is my mother-in-law. She married my father-in-law after I married J.D. By all accounts, this was about me showing up to support her.
Tell that to the girl on the back row crying to herself.
Every funeral, since those of 2006, first burying my Nunna and then my D-daddy, has been a revisiting of their funerals. Every burial has been me burying them again. You must understand that they were my stars. They were EVERYTHING in the world that was stable and loving. I love my parents and losing them will be hard. But losing my grandparents was like losing my true north. And my compass has never recovered.
So today, sitting in the back row, alone, at the funeral of man I barely knew, I tried desperately to not interrupt the grief of another family. And I grieved the loss of the only unconditional love I have ever understood.
I am unsure who was more pitifully clad on Sunday. The tree, which remained unadorned, or J.D. in his many layers. Personally, I like to think he is just ahead of the curve for the return of flannel and Doc Martens.
One of the side effects of starting the Carb Lover’s Diet during the summer was a noticeable increase in the number of smoothies consumed in the house. Don’t get me wrong, I love smoothies. But J.D. decided that he really loved smoothies more than any other breakfast option. Six months later and you can see the outcome. That would be our ex-blender. I wish I had taken a picture of the parts that actually disintegrated. There was no salvaging this baby. I actually stepped out of the shower and wondered what was on fire.
The good news is that we had one on standby. Apparently I moved it around, house to house for an entire decade, just for this moment. (Please ignore the messy counter top.) I believe that last real action this bad boy saw was blending Slim Fast powder with milk in 1982. (Mmmm, chalky cocoa flavored goodness.) Who knows why my grandparents bought it in the first place. And dear god is it loud. Bean cover’s her ears the runs by the kitchen in an effort to make it to the living room without doing too much permanent damage to her eardrums. I’m inclined to get her noise cancelling headphones for the holidays.
In the meantime, here is a lovely close-up so you can truly appreciate the harvest gold mellowness of the old girl. And also see that it is a Waring blender, you know, like the one made famous by the Warren Zevon song. Does Waring even make blenders anymore?
3:30. AM. One car. Two planes. Two trains. 11 hours. Seriously rethinking the saving of 30$ from not hiring a car. Would have been here 2 hours earlier.